bitten by a bioengineered spider,
transformed into a human arachnid
masking my identity from my loyal girlfriend--
her name is Mary Jane Watson--
the beautiful redhead, the hottest one!
I weave my aerial web, a costumed vigilante
fighting techno villains
in a metropolitan Dante....
I am the New Amsterdam,
New York's oldest theatre,
restored after decades of neglect
and disrepair,
when the rats scurried through the mezzanine
and the rain soaked the seats
through a triple-X neon dream
until the 90's when Disney came along,
scored new Tin Pan Alley songs--
from the Lion King and Mary Poppins,
rubbing their magic lamp of Aladdin......
I am the boisterous Elder Cunningham
a renegade Latter Day Saint
from utopian Salt Lake--
on my mission to the profane Ugandans,
writing my very own version
of the Book of Mormon,
protecting the women from circumcision,
standing up to the warlord's intimidation.
And I am angel boy Moroni Elder Price
hiding behind a golden smile of nice,
in my starched white shirt
and narrow black tie
always asking the question of why
I can't live in Disneyland
under the spell of Tinkerbell's wand.....
I am the prince searching desperately
for the beautiful owner
of the one and only lost glass slipper,
and I am also Cinderella
riding in a crystal carriage,
looking for a prince's invitation to marriage,
longing for happily ever after
away from servitude
to my wicked stepmother....
but somehow, isn't it always something
how at the stroke of midnight
the carriage turns back into a pumpkin?
Where in the forest is the fairy godmother
at the darkest hour when you most need her?
I am Guy singin' and strummin'
my song of lost love
on the cobblestone streets
of contemporary Dublin,
meeting the Czech Girl,
feeling the attraction, needing her affection
while oblivious to the reality
of her situation:
separated from her husband, taking care of her daughter,
providing a home for her friends and her mother;
Still, we make beautiful music together,
but we both know it simply can't last forever;
and when it comes time for me to go,
I surprise her with the piano,
bought with the money me dad gave me,
a bittersweet benediction
to the end of the show.......
Once we were one
and now two, twice--
why does fire have to freeze into ice?
You and I are the audience and we are the actors,
we are the producers and the choreographers,
and we're all in this drama workshopping together,
creating live and living theater,
by darkest night and brightest day
no matter what age,
on our very own Broadway stage.
Some of us are born to be divas and stars
and others understudies,
but we all have our roles to play,
none of us are nobodies.
And there's one thing that I've learned
on my lifelong Broadway run:
I can only turn the dark off
if my light is switched on........